Blogger? I used to be one of those, back in the day.
Back before things changed, got weird, got complicated. Back before I started running and back before I injured my knee and stopped running. Back before our years of IVF finally resulted in a positive pregnancy test. Back before I started yoga. Back before the twins were born and back before I stopped yoga. Back before I started running again and back before I pinned my very first race bib to my top at my very first running event. Back before the twins turned one, turned two, turned three.
Back before so many things: things I’ve already shared and things I doubt I’ll ever share. Things I’ll never forget and things I’ve long since forgotten.
Blogger? I was one of those when I first got to this country over ten years ago now. It was an en-masse solution to the challenge of keeping people up to date with my news and it was way more easy than writing letters. Facebook you say? I didn’t have Facebook back then. I don’t think many people did back then, not back in the day.
So I was a blogger. I wrote about my new days in a new country and it was topical. It was current and it was pleasant but eventually it wasn’t so new and I got tired of topical and current and pleasant. I changed tack. I looked back at my old life before these new days and I wrote about the unpleasant, the confronting. I wrote about what really lay in the dark corners of a seemingly light room. I wrote about regrets and nightmares, interlaced them with hopes and dreams and things were good being a blogger but then things started to change. I started to run out of highs and lows and what was left wasn’t anything I could find compelling words for, Eventually the flow diminished to a trickle and then barely a drip. I found that I had run out of words, run out of the time to find them and even the desire to look for them.
Since then life has continued to be kind to me. I’ve started writing many things, finished writing none of them but through it all I’ve realised that writing is good for me. Writing helps keep me balanced , helps me document the moments I’d otherwise forget and so this is my blog. It will be both new and a reworking, a combination of fresh tales told and new spins put to old tales – and this time it won’t be exclusively highs and lows or black and whites because that isn’t my life. It was never my life, even if that’s how it seemed back in the day. There was always an element of grey.
Back in the day. My previous time as a blogger was defined by those four words, by panning that yesteryear river until there was nothing left sparkling amidst the grit. Regardless of whether you knew me in those Yukon days of yore or have just arrived here not knowing me from Adam, you’re very welcome here. Welcome to a brand new day.